Kokuhaku
by Gein
Summary: Kenshin spends a night at Hiko's cabin when training with him, which leads to a confession. Will Hiko return the feelings? Shounen ai, pretty angsty. HikoxKenshin! ^


Greetings, ye merrymen!! *medieval music plays* How are ye?? Of course you're fine! Well, even though I've never myself read a fic about this pairing, me being the stupid little puppetmaster that I am decided to make a fic to this pairing! ^^ Hooray! *trumpets blow* I think it's sorta a nice pairing, don't ye?? Although, even if Hiko did really love his baka deshi, he wouldn't admit it, huh?? Oh, well. They make a nice father/son pair! Haha, incest! *sharp things thrown at Gein* WHAT?~! Anyway, Rurouni Kenshin is property of Watsuki sensei, Shueisha, and others. So read the fic!   
  
Kokuhaku  
  
Kenshin sighed and tried to relax in the small bed. His master's training had been incredibly vigorous, and now he wasw mentally and physically exhausted. But he couldn't sleep. In the main room he heard Hiko close the front slider and he had a strange urge to join him outside.   
  
But he knew Hiko could only stand so much of him after Kenshin had dispbeyed him and tainted his non-killing teachings.  
  
Kenshin turned towards the door. 'Maybe Shishou wouldn't really mind if I joined him...maybe I could say something to make him approve of me.' Kenshin thought hopefully.  
  
He got up and opened the door quietly, not seeing Hiko anywhere. "Shishou? Shishou?" Kenshin wondered around in the woodland, searching for his master's footprints, finally finding the imprints in mud.  
  
Kenshin ran to where they ended, looking up to see Hiko's back. He was sitting on a rock, staring off the cliff that he and Kenshin usuallt practiced on. The waterfall rushed quickly behind them, making Kenshin's footsteps inaudible. Kenshin called out Hiko's honerary softly. "Uuhh...Shishou?" Hiko flinched, stood, and whirled around. "What do you want now, baka deshi?" he asked flatly.  
  
Kenshin looked down, searching for the perfect words. "I hope you...uuhh...don't mind if...I stay here...Shishou." Hiko sighed, glaring at Kenshin. "Do as you like, but don't bother me." Hiko poured sake into his cup, drinking slowly.  
  
Kenshin sat on the ground beside him, looking down. "You should be in bed by now, baka deshi. If I remember correctly, you aren't a morning person," Hiko said quietly. "Ehehh...I couldn't sleep. I was just...I don't know. I wnated to talk to you," Kenshin admitted thoughtfully. Hiko snorted. "Talk away."  
  
Kenshin looked down again, afraid that what he was going to say would irritate Hiko. "I...I think about this all the time...I have to let you know...I'm sorry."   
  
hiko looked hard at Kenshin, searching for any signs of mockery. "I don't suppose you expect me to say 'forgiven', right?" he asked quietly. Kenshin closed his eyes and laughed softly, but Hiko knew he was on the verge of crying.  
  
"I'm sorry for everything, Shishou. I chose to be a hitokiri and it was a bad choice. I'm so sorry for everything, Shishou. I thought I wasw right and doing the right thing, but..." Kenshin choked on his words and tried to fight back the tears. "I...I'm sorry for being such a burden all these years. But you raised me well, Shishou...and I'm sorry everything went wrong. Sorry..." Kenshin gripped his sleeves tightly, biting his lip.  
  
Hiko's eyes softened. "I guess I should apologize, too. after you left, I wanted to take back everything I said.  
  
"I missed you all this time. That little kid that you once were before you left me. That naive little kid who couldn't do anything right and was afraid of sake."  
  
Hiko flashed a toothy smirk at Kenshin, waving the sake jug in front of him. "It's good, you know," he stated. Kenshin smiled and shook his head.  
  
Hiko looked at him for a while, a small breeze blowing through his and Kenshin's long hair. "Strange...at first I couldn't see it when you came here, but now I do." Kenshin raised his head, confused.  
  
"I look at you right now, and I see all of you so perfectly. You've still got that same look in your eyes as the kid I miss so much," Hiko said softly. Kenshin's mouth moved inaudibly and the tears of joy were clear in his eyes. Hiko smirked and stood up, pouring the sake into the waterfall. "I need a refill," he muttered.  
  
Kenshin stood up, facing Hiko. Hiko turned to leave. "Shishou!" Kenshin cried. Hiko turned around, one eyebrow cocked. A strong wind blew Kenshin's hair around his face as the tears finally streamed down.  
  
Kenshin smiled. "I never showed you how I feel about you." Hiko smirked. "I know what you want to do, baka deshi. I don't hug other men. But..." Hiko sighed, his arms outstretched. "For just this time I'll make an exception."  
  
Kenshin threw himself at Hiko, wrapping his arms around Hiko's neck, and burying his face in the crook of his neck. Hiko held Kenshin's waist and back securely, crushing the air out of him. Kenshin hugged back just as hard, sobbing.  
  
"Shishou...Shishou..." 'I don't know how to say it...' Kenshin cussed at himself, digging his fingers into Hiko's back. "I...I'm...sorry..." Hiko let go after a while, which was too soon for Kenshin. "Well..." Hiko continued, trying not to sound embarrassed. Kenshin smiled, but Hiko could clearly see the sadness in his eyes. Hiko sighed, turning away.  
  
"We should get back now. You have training first thing in the morning." They both walked silently back to the cabin, an uncomfortable feeling growing worse by the second.   
  
They got into the house and Kenshin paused, unsure of what to say. Hiko arched an eyebrow. "May I stay up just a little longer, Shishou?" Kenshin asked pleadingly. Hiko sighed, waving his hand uninterestedly. "Fine. But don't complain about being tired tomorrow."  
  
Kenshin smiled and nodded, sitting next to Hiko on his bed. A few moments passed before Kenshin quietly said, "Shishou?" Hiko's eyes moved to Kenshin. Kenshin looked down, unsure if he should say it. "When...when i battle Shishio will you be there?"  
  
Hiko snorted, smirking at Kenshin. "Baka deshi. Your battles are none of my business. Hell, if you hadn't disobeyed me, you wouldn't be in this situation." Kenshin looked sadly at Hiko, his glassy eyes becoming wet with tears. "I'm sorry I...don't know how to act it..." Kenshin murmured.  
  
"You can't. You made a mistake, and no matter how many times you say you're sorry and try to act like nothing happened, we'll both know and never forget." Kenshin's eyes widened as he heard Hiko murmur, "And the pain will still be there..."  
  
Hiko got up, setting his sake jug down. Now talking to you has made me tired. Let's go to bed, baka-" he was cut off as Kenshin's slender arms wrapped around his stomach and held on tightly from the back. "What...are you doing...?" Hiko asked, clearly shocked. Kenshin buried his face in Hiko's lower back, making his words soft and muffled. "Shishou..." Hiko's eyes widened as what was happening finally registered. "Shishou," Kenshin's small voice started. "I love-" Kenshin gasped in surprise and pain as Hiko spun around and backhanded him in the stomach.   
  
Kenshin flew back and hit the wall. There was a bright light and the world came crashing down. Kenshin's mind tried to make sense of what was happening. Hiko let out a barely audible gasp as he realized what he did, but didn't help him up. "Think before you act. That's a foolish thing to do," he stated coldly, but was amazed at the words that came so smoothly out of his mouth.  
  
To Hiko's surprise, Kenshin pushed himself up against the wall and responded strongly, "Shishou...i know this might offend you, what I'm saying, but I need you to at least hear me out. I love you, Shishou, and while you obviously don't feel the same, I just want you to know. and I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything and...and I just want you to acknowledge that!"  
  
Hiko turned away, not wanting Kenshin to see the tears pooling. Kenshin took a step forward, clenching his fists tightly. "Shishou...please, say something! do something! Kick me, punch me, yell at me, I don't care! Just say anything!" he cried, tears streaming down his face.  
  
Hiko's voice stayed firm. "Just go to bed. I won't tolerate any more of this foolishness tonight. I expect ou up early tomorrow, and disallow any talk about what happened tonight. I'll forget about what just happened if you do."  
  
Kenshin fought the urge to cry as he bowed and turned to his room. The door closed quietly, and Hiko sighed, falling onto the ground, letting the tears go away. He almost smiled, remembering the look on Kenshin's face before he had turned away.  
  
How many times had he seen that face? Whenever he and Kenshin ahd trained for long hours, by the time night fell, Kenshin would have that upset look on his face. Hiko's smile faded. "Have I been like this for that long?" he asked himself quietly.  
  
Hiko got uo and paused before Kenshin's door, wincing as he heard short, gasping sobs. "Kenshin..." he murmured. Kenshin's sobs grew quieter, and Hiko could hear him talking quietly. Hiko opened the door a crack to see Kenshin slumped against the wall, holding himself.   
  
His hair was down, a fiery red curtain covering his face, but doing nothing to hide his tears. "Shishou...Shishou...I'm so sorry..." Hiko looked down, feeling uncomprehensibly guilty. Kenshin whimpered, pulling hs knees to his chest.  
  
'This is so awkward...' Hiko thought, suppressing a sigh. Kenshin began talking again, his voice cracking and muffled. "I love you, Shishou...I'm so sorry."  
  
Kenshin gasped as he heard Hiko close the door. Hiko stood outside the door for a long time until everything was quiet, then opened the door again to see Kenshin leaning uncomfortably against the wall, asleep. Hiko gently picked him up and carried him to his room. Kenshin was laid down on Hiko's futon. Hiko squeezed Kenshin's hand briefly before tucking him under the cool covers. Kenshin was awake enough to be shocked when he felt Hiko's warm but rough lips press slowly against his. Hiko gently hugged Kenshin, blew out the candle and closed the door.  
  
back in the solitude of his room, Hiko smiled, eyes watering. "I forgive you."  
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Well, did'ja cry? Of course not...*sniff* now ye are making me cry! You people....anyway, it was kinda rushed at the end, and I had absolutely no idea of how to end it, so that's how it turned out. I'm not sure if I'm very pleased with the results myself...eheheh...^^; Anyway, ye merrymen had better REVIEW!! It's a way of showing the author you liked the fic...(or disliked it, whichever) so please do! It makes every author hApPy!! ^^ Yeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh!! ^_^  
REVIEW!! =]  
  
"Well, if you're not going to wake up, I'll just sit back and keep remembering old times. Like the last time you wet the bed, the autumn you were eleven. Or the time you were so hungry you ate those toadstools and almost died."~Hiko =D 


End file.
